do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
