This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
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