Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Randomize
