can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.