Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Randomize
