She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
