So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
im six kinds of drunk right now
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Randomize
