Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Randomize
