you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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