Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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