Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize