You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
