i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
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