If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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