I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
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I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
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I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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