Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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