if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
