He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize