Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
