wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
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