i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?