it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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