suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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