I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
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