You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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