the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
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