I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
