Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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