Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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