Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
