Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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