that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
