Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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