Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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