She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
