do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
Randomize
