They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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