Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Randomize
