New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
