i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
