first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
