Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
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I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
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C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
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