I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
so much tequila, so little girl.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
Randomize
