There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
