Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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