kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Randomize
