so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
