i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
