you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
