it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
